Cabin Fever with Kiddos?
By Kay Gackle, LMFT
Most of us are probably enjoy having our kids around: with no activities, no outside-of-the-home places to go, no playgrounds, and no school. We have them all to ourselves. Or maybe you’re like me, and find yourself grateful for this sweet time, knowing that this time will end eventually. But, still, you find yourself wondering at the beginning of each day, “just how many hours is it until bedtime?”
Here are a few tips I have found to be helpful:
1. Develop a Block Schedule - Depending on the age of your children, block scheduling can be helpful to offer a little “freedom” in the day for them, and structure for you. For example, art time/music time, reading time, play time, school time, rest time, outside time, etc. These can be modified to your family, and your child can either come up with their own ideas to do during these blocks; or if they are younger, you can create a list of options for them to go to during each block. Set up a schedule with your blocks each day; you can either have shorter blocks and do them all in one day or pick a few blocks to do a day and switch it up. *This can also be helpful if both parents are home and needing to work with kids at home. Parents can trade off blocks throughout the day.
2. Individual time - As a family, we are together most of the time, right now. It’s important that kids and adults find time for themselves. If you have younger children, you might have to find this time while they are sleeping. We are dealing with unusual circumstances right now, so it might call for some unique ways to create space for individual time. Give yourself some grace and be open to breaking your own “rules” here. I don’t promote screens as a default, but if you are having to make a choice between sanity and screens, sanity should win. Your children may be older and, thus, able to play or read by themselves. This is good: encourage everyone to find some time to be alone, when needed. This time will help give some rhythm to your days as well.
3. Choose the relationship - We are all going to get frustrated with our “new normal” at some point. Maybe your spouse is working from home and it feels like the whole house is the “new office”. Perhaps both parents need to work, and you’re stressed out trying to make it all work. There may be financial strain or challenges finding childcare. Or, maybe your kids are having a hard time dealing with their own anxieties and change in structure, too. Parenting through this can be difficult, but, choose the relationship. This is not a normal time for any of us, including our children. And, just like us, our kids are managing best they know how, in all of this unknown, with questions we may not be able to answer. Take a deep breath, remind yourself of this truth, and choose the relationship.
I really hope these ideas will help your family. Look for opportunities: In the midst of difficulty, change, and, uncertainty, we also find opportunity. As parents, we may even find that we are in a space to actually do the some of the things we’ve wanted to do with our kids, didn’t have the time. These are opportunities, if we can remember to see our “new normal” in that light. We will get through this time. And, hopefully with even more coping strategies and parenting tools than we had before.
